Practicing relaxation and stress relief can be great for your relationships [1]. Relieving stress can help you create more space for self-reflection, leaving you with more energy for your partner. When you’re dealing well with stress, you’re better equipped to face new challenges, and more creative at solving problems.
Studies have shown that people who are relaxed can be more enjoyable to be around and more encouraging to others. If you’ve ever spent a lot of time around a stressed person, you might have noticed that you start to feel stressed and unhappy too. Humans are social animals – we are tuned to respond to things that might be perceived as threatening [2], and it puts us in a more alert state. Equally, if you spend time with someone who is relaxed and happy, it can have a positive influence on your mood and behaviour [3].
Relaxation techniques you can try
There are many relaxation techniques you can try that may help you cope better with stress. As you practise, these techniques can start to feel more natural and will become more habitual in your daily life. Here are a couple of tips to get started.
- Practice being playful. When was the last time you did something fun without any deeper purpose? Playfulness is when you do something you genuinely want to engage in that brings you joy [4]. Low-pressure, low-risk play can reduce stress, so look for activities that are specific to you and your interests. It could be anything from dancing in the kitchen, to playing a board game, or having a kickaround with a football. A bit of friendly competition is fine too, as long as the stakes are low. The important thing is that you don’t feel like you are striving to achieve something [4]. For more inspiration, have a look at this list of over 250 pleasant activities [5].
- Release the pressure. Playfulness does not have to be a big event. Allow yourself to inject little bits of playfulness into your life, and notice what it does to your mood. You can make almost any activity playful by bringing a sense of light-heartedness and humour to it [6]. You can make waiting for the bus with your friend playful by telling a funny story about a time you were kept waiting for a date, or playing a game like ‘I Spy’.
- Practice body awareness. Body awareness, or somatic exercises, are activities where you work to connect the mind and body [7]. This practice can reduce stress and increase feelings of wellbeing, helping you to feel more connected to your own thoughts and feelings, and becoming a better partner or friend. There are many kinds of somatic exercises including yoga, progressive muscle relaxation, dance, Pilates, or Tai Chi. Any movement-based activity can work, as long as you are focused on being mindful of your body’s movement. Think about what kind of movement might work for your body, find an activity that appeals, and give it a go [7].
How should I practice relaxation?
Relaxation techniques are like any other skill. They will take practice, especially if this is not something you are used to. Be patient with yourself and try different things. Most importantly, don’t be discouraged if something doesn’t work. What works for you may be completely different to what you expected [8]. Once you find a few things you enjoy, share one of those things with someone you like spending time with. Relaxation can be enjoyed alone or socially, and spending time with friends can be good for your mental health [4].
By Helen Molloy
References
[1] Schoen Clinic Group. (2024). The impact of stress in relationships.
[2] Ohwovoriole, T. (2023). How Herd Mentality Explains Our Behavior. VeryWellMind.
[4] Brown, B. (2012). The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings on Authenticity, Connection, and Courage. Sounds True, Incorporated.
[5] Linehan, M. (2014). DBT Skills Training Manual (2nd). Guilford Press.
[6] Harris, G. (2021). Everyday Playfulness: a new approach to children’s play and adult responses to it. International Journal of Play, 11, (3).
[7] Meehan, E. Carter, B. (2021). Moving With Pain: What Principles From Somatic Practices Can Offer to People Living With Chronic Pain. Frontiers in Psychology. 620381, (11). 10.3389/fpsyg.2020.620381.
